Ten steps ahead and I’m tripping
my distance from you keeps slipping
like sun and moon, hide and seek
I turn and smile, little peek
and listen – to that slow beat
it always rhymes on repeat
Ten steps ahead and I’m tripping
my distance from you keeps slipping
Written for d’Verse, where Grace challenges us to write an ‘Octelle’ poem described below:
- eight lines using personification and symbolism in a telling manner
- syllabic: 8, 8, 7, 7, 7, 7, 8, 8
- rhyming: A1/A2/b/b/c/c/A1/A2
- the first two lines and the last two lines are identical
Tricia Sankey 
Nice one. The turn around suggest the person does not really want to be far away from the other. There is tension but there us also longing.
Much💖love
I appreciate your comment, Gillena, yes, it’s a love game! ❣️
Your poem of hide and seek, flowed so well. Love this part specially:
and listen – to that slow beat
it always rhymes on repeat
Thanks for joining in!
This was a great challenge, thanks for hosting, Grace! ❣️
great flow and wonderful piece Tricia!
💖💖
Thanks, Cindy, glad you enjoyed it! 🌜🌞🌛
It feels like a first date up in the foothills of a mountain to me. Love how the two are playing together.
Thanks, Lisa! I love your interpretation! 🌥️🌤️⛅
❤
This is charming Tricia. Love is a fun game of tease and playfulness and your Octelle captures it ☺️💕
Thanks so much, Christine! ❤️🌹
I loved the playful tone of this piece!
Thanks, Nitin!! ♥️🌹
this is such a playful write, Tricia – I love it 😀
❤
David
Thanks, David, rhymes always feel playful to me! 🌤️🌛⛅
Beautiful and clever – well done!
So glad you enjoyed it! ♥️🌹
Fair trips along 🙂
Thanks, Jane! ⛅🌛🌤️
wonderful. I can see how this is a love game. thanks for the beauty.
Glad you enjoyed, Selma! 💖
Wonderful expression! Loved the poem!
Thanks so much! 🌛💕🌤️
Love this poem and that first line especially, the ongoing waltz between sun and moon, the feeling of love affair which is always a dance! ❤
Thanks so much, Sunra! It is a cosmic dance! ♥️🌹
Love the refrain lines, Tricia and the cosmic love dance. ❤️
Thanks so much, Punam, it’s always fun to try a new form! ❣️
Ah, the clumsiness of first lust, which may, or may not mature into love–a fun write, coy and awkward.
Thanks, Glenn, I appreciate your thoughtful interpretation! ♥️🌹
The struggle is real .I had fun reading this aloud. Sweet beat!
Thanks, Mish, glad you enjoyed! ❣️🎶
I like the tripping rhythm you’ve applied to this form 😊
Thanks, Ingrid, off-beat is a gift of mine! 😆
Wonderful. 💖
Thanks so much, Jeff! 🥰
You’re welcome, Tricia! Always. ♥️
💖